Monday, October 1, 2012

That one wierd moment

Have ever had those moments where a wave of unhappiness just washes over you out of nowhere? You could be sitting at the kitchen table cutting tomatoes listening to Bach or taking your daily walk by the beach checking out the hot 'surfer' guys, and WHAM! it just hits you. A sad feeling of missing someone/thing from your life. A red, solid brick square in the face. And that ONE person pops into mind, who had been a real special part of your life once upon a time. A veryyyyy long time back.


Why THAT one person? Why not someone that is just two miles away, or just a phonecall away? Or better yet right in the next room only two steps away? Nop. Can't be as easy as that can it, or it just wouldn't be called life, would it? No no nooooo. It has to be that one person who you hadn't spoken to in centuries, who you have had some pretty childishly embarassing (but fond) memories to cherish with and who could be probably married the second time and be a father to four bloody kids for all you know. And out of the million much more memorable & romantic encounters in life, your brain has to go and miss that ONE person! Seriously? Talk about life throwing big, juicy watermelons at you. Atleast I have the opportunity to blame it all on my frantic hormones that seem to be doing the roller coaster ride with my emotions taken my swelled condition.

So what do you do? Go back memory lane a bit while you're still cutting up those tomatoes or avoiding bicyclists, and think up all those funny/romantic memories that melts your heart even further. Ahhh....what blissful days. Bring out your blackberry and browse through your friends of friends of friends pictures on FB to see if you might spot a picture of him anywhere at all. Oh! That horrible empty spot of longing that seems to widen with every passing second! Should you try and contact him to let him know how much you crave his attention right this very minute, or your heart might just disfunction and break down any moment now? Then comes 'The big fight'. At this stage, the brain realises that an important portion of your grey matter is being engaged in a very useless train of thoughts and thus distracting you horribly from the cutting/walking. So it fights down the poor, melancholy heart with hard ass facts.

'You do remember that BS of a guy cheated on you with your closest friend, that too right under your nose, eh?'

'And what about the time he lied to you about loving till death do us apart, when his intentions were to only screw you in bed?'

The heart retaliates poorly. Unfortunately, most of the times its a lose - lose situation for the weak heart where it never was respected in the first place. So the big, wide gap of longing fills up with murky waters of hate once again.

And by this time, the tomatoes are all cut up or you have reached your front door already.

So much to have given someone the hiccups of their life.

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