Another page in the Book of Love - 1

The darkness had settled in by now. Silence was as thick as mist in the air. She looked him straight in the eye and whispered "Promise me you'll never love anyone the way you have loved me." He paused before answering back, silenced by the intense desperation in her voice, the truth that shone in her eyes. A rare second. It seemed a decade passed as he wished this moment would never end. "I promise I can't love anyone like I have loved you."

And his life changed forever.

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The car was going really fast now. But she hardly noticed. She couldnt take her eyes off the full moon that shone so bright tonight, overshadowing the tiny stars. They say it is the closest to earth after 20 years. Was he watching it too? What was he thinking?  Damn! She dragged her eyes away from the sky and tried focusing on reading the ugly, meaningless signs that passed her in a blur. Anything to take her mind of him. Time heals wounds. Pfft! Whoever said that, didn't own a watch.


Getting home, she dropped into bed without so much as bothering to kick her shoes off. What was wrong with her? Everything was as perfect as can be, but he still lingered in those dark corners of her mind. Sneaking out on her every few minutes. Repeating the so called memories. This time it was war! Cruel as it may seem, she will kill the heart for good now. No use bringing the past up. Not now. Not when everything is perfect.

                                                                 ***********

She was was high on smoke and music. It felt like the hiphop beats reverbrating through the room were in perfect sync with her hearbeat. Was her heart even beating? She couldn't feel it anymore. To think about it, there is hardly much she could feel right now, except this growing frustration that gnawed on her insides. Why was he so nervous? He seemed to be fidgeting with something in his bag. "I have to ask you something." Dazed with all the excess smoke that seemed to cloud her senses, she felt herself nod. Everything was going in slow motion. He bought out a small red velvet box and she knew what it was before he even opened it. Horror pooled in her stomach as her throat went dry. It felt like someone had just dumped acid down it.

He had been serious all along.

                                                                     ***********

She jumped in fright. Sweating crazily and dead cold at the same time. What the hell happened here? Why was it so dark? Where was she? She groped frantically around to get hold on anything. Her fringe was stuck like seaweed to her forehead, and thorned into her eyes. Swiping at it, she rubbed her eyes to open them wider. Finally her pupils adjusted to the dark. She was in her room. She had fallen asleep while thinking. Someone had turned off the lights and turned the air conditioner to the lowest temperature possible. 4:18 a.m. Damn those memories! I should be used to this by now. Thinking that she got up to pour some water down her parched throat. Suddenly she stopped. Was it still there? She looked down at her finger, half expecting the diamonds to glint back cheerfully at her. It was empty. Sadness washed over her like a tide and she felt tears stinging her eyes. Its over. But those words still didn't take away the pain that squeezed her heart every so often.

                                                                     ************

Months had passed since he had last seen her. "We can't be the same anymore. I have to stop talking to you. My parents are too old-fashioned for this." It still echoed in his ears. Like that forbidden day when he got her email. He hadn't believed it then, and he didn't believe it now. She hasn't talked to him since. He had been blocked off of every channel of communication he had with her. She knew he had meant every word he promised her, then what was she punishing him for?! He flipped through her pictures that were now engraved on his mind. Her smile. That is what he had fallen for. She will come back to me. She has to. A lone tear traced it's way down his cheek. He looked over to his almost filled bags. Or I will.

To be continued... 

Colour me Beautiful.

Ever thought how the world would be without colors? If everything was either only black or white.

No cheerful yellows and pinks to brighten your day. Or bold reds or blues to define your mood. And no purples and greens to look sexy in.

Only black. Or white.

Totally depressing.

Life would completely lose it's charm.

If people are so depressed in a beautiful world like this, a colorless one would be overfilled with phsycopaths.

I can imagine it like a vision from tomorrow. Dead trees, dead sky, dead land. Vampires slomping around everwhere, trying to get their veiny, crooked hands on anything breathing to suck blood out of (isn't that what they do?). Dusty air with a stink in the air. A living example of darwins theory in action. Ew! *shudder*

So maybe my imagination ran away a bit up there, but think about it!

How can you only have clothes that are shades of grey, black or white?? How can you ever attempt to grab ur guys attention if you can't have a more attention-grabbing color?? So you just stand there helpless in ur boring black baby doll frock while the long legged beauty whisks him away in her white body hugger (with her perfect body)?!

Life would pretty much suck if choosing ur underwear would only be from black or white, or if ur food would be in shades of gray. Imagine a pizza in shades of black. Kills the appetite immediately.

But in real...we have those lovely colors all around us!

In those pretty little flowers that seem to dot every corner and bit of the country, some coloured pink, some violet.

And we have the beautiful palms trees that are so green, they take your stress-of-life away with every swish of their long leafy branches.

And we have the lovely blue water that ripples as the white swans glide Oh so gracefully through it.

The bright, yellow sun that gives breathtaking sunsets as it changes colors to gorgeous shades of orange and red.

In short, color the world beautiful! :)

Antique fuchsia? Granny Smith Apple? Stizza? Nop. Not brands of shoes or name of things you might on grocery shelves. Just fancy ways of naming colors with different mixtures of shades. Something that you would come across in a book of paint colors, or fabrics.

Hit me with those fancy names anytime.

I would love a silk coloured Jazzberry Jam, or a Lazer lemon Roll-up to savour on.

To be honest, I don't even know why I wrote a post on colors. But what i do know is I've always appreciated colors in life. The different hues we see around us all the time.

They just add this wild fascination to my hunger of adventure.

Short mindbits (March)

March 12, 12:33 a.m.

" Lately I've been getting everyone pissed at me. Every word I form with my lips seem to have a negative effect. To irritate the living cell out of him. I unintentionally seem to burst this disgustingly gay bubbles that people seem to be living in constantly. Where they believe that life is all about driving down a perfect blue beach in their sexy little cars watching the gorgeous sunset as it fades away. Is it really me? This almost dead, confused person who walks around lost in memories? Almost like I'm back in time with you."

March 12, 6:47 p.m.

"It's a beautiful day out here. I especially love how the innocent breeze can make everything sway to it's rhythm. Almost like it has everything in it's power. Like it gives life to the non living. Giving them an invisible hand to move to this beat of time. How the spring flowers shimmer in their beauty as their soft petals flutter lightly.
But what scares is how the dark slowly sets in. Almost like it creeps in to your world secretly shunning the light out. I don't want the light to go. It then takes away your capacity to see the bright cheerfulness of the day. But god promises something. That light will be back in your life soon enough. Soon enough. "

March 13, 11:39 a.m.

"There comes a point in life when it becomes hard to believe that a person can detach from you. Although it is a possible thing, the bond is so strong that it's impossible to even consider such a thought. The friendship is taken for granted. But then it happens. And your world falls apart."

March 14, 6:28 p.m   

" How is it possible to live life just to please someone? Every goal in life is altered just for their sake. Every breath u take is about winning a piece of their heart. Every little step is to make their dreams come true. And even then one tends to be unthankful. When they cry the cry of being alone. Don't they know that someone's world revolves around the number of times they smile?

There are examples of really nice people out there who hand their hearts out to that person on no conditions whatsoever. And then their is that one person who cruelly tramples on it."

Loneliness

What is loneliness? Why does a person get inflicted by it at times? If man was made to be his own companion, why does he need people around constantly? More specifically, why do we always need love to survive?

Isn't it ironic how when the night is supposed to be the most beautiful part of the day, yet it brings with it evil of all kinds. Maybe that's why our bodies were created to sleep it off. But we still go through the torture of laying awake at the oddest hours, and have our minds corrupted with the insingnificant of thoughts. And have those thoughts invade our heart with excrutiating pain. Sadness, exhaustion, longing. All emotions that carry pain. But nothing comes close to loneliness.

Doesn't a man want to spend the days of his life with himself only? Nobody like his own soul who understands him best. To please himself by fulfilling its wants, feed himself to be fulfilled, be content with no complications whatsoever. To avoid misunderstandings, frustrations when things dont go your way and incomplete love. But no. We were created to interact emotionally with other humans by giving love, in order to recieve some. And when one is unable to provide love, or Is prevented by the ugliness of human nature to do so, he sinks into the depths of complete self-pity and unwanted stress of being morally and emotionally unsatisfied. The heart pulpulates pain with every squeeze, till it becomes unbearable at one point. And eyes begin to overflow with water. How wierd it is that those little droplets of water that so slowly slide down the delicate skin, calms the heart within. So that the pain doesn't burst into flames and reduce you to ashes. To nothing.


But have you ever thought, why did god make us this way? This strong longing for love and satisfaction all the time? Maybe because He wants ourselves to remember something that we so easily tend to forget. That when those moments of loneliness come crashing on to you, when you think you don't have what ur longing for, He is right there. Watching you from above. His love greater than life. He who always listens to you, looks out for you and never ever leaves you to the wolves for even a second. Why? Because he loves you constantly. That one entity that will never let you drown into those never ending depths of mental emptiness. Never.

And that contradicts loneliness.

Heart on Lyrics - Jhoom (Ali Zafar)

maine tujhe dekha

hanste hue galon mein

bezar khayalon mein

husun ke hawalo mein

soni ke balon mein

morni ki chalo mein

matti ke pyalo mein

pital ke thano mein

jitni tu milti jaye

utni lage hai todhi todhi

jab bhi tu le angdayi

aake mere ori to

dil jhoom jhoom chale
jhoom jhoom chale soneha soneha

dil jhoom jhoom chale

jhoom jhoom chale soneha soneha

Bachapan ke sawan beete

ladkpan ki beeti dhara

jab mud ke dekha piche

to choota jeevan sara

phir bhi teri aas pakad ke

har ik din guzara hai

teri ik nazar pe meri

sans ka sahara hai

tumse veenti karat hun

dil todo na hamara

Dil jhoom jhoom chale

jhoom jhoom chale soneha soneha

dil jhoom jhoom chale

jhoom jhoom chale soneha soneha

Do matware naina hamare
teri hi rah takat hain pyare

mann ki mere preet bujha re

tan ke mere sez saza re

sochat kyun rehum to hare

bar barhar dar dar har dagar

karun tera intezar

dil jhoom jhoom chale

jhoom jhoom chale soneha soneha

dil jhoom jhoom chale

jhoom jhoom chale soneha soneha

Maine tujhe dekha

subha ke unjalo mein

nadiya mein nalon mein

lamho mein salon mein

pyar karne walon mein

junoon mein jiyalo mein

ishk ke malalo mein

zinda misalon mein

jitni tu milti jaye

utni lage todhi todhi

zindagi ki dori maine

piya sang jodi

dil jhoom jhoom chale

jhoom jhoom chale chale soneha

dil jhoom chale jhoom jhoom chale soneha........................o soneha